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Why I’m no longer on Twitch and other updates

So, most of you by now have realized that I am no longer on Twitch. I started off Tuesday – Sunday 8 hours a day, then that switched to 6 hours a day until ultimately I stopped streaming. It wasn’t something that came easy, I was conflicted over it for a while.

Until the first week went by.

And then the second, and third.

I was noticing significant changes in my life. For the 8 months I streamed, I never really realized how much it affected me. I was becoming impatient, moody, and constantly irritable.

I’m naturally quiet, having to talk and be entertaining for 6-8 hours a day 6 days a week was insane. I am certainly not built for this silly inane chatter that is apparently entertaining to people.

The only saving grace is the people that visit your channel. The ones that sit and chat with you every day and support you. It becomes a lovely comfort to the savage, undercutting behavior that is other streamers. I mean every word of that, and I will have the grace to not mention names of said individuals out of respect for their profession. Yes, even the nice ones. They are businessmen/women and you are a tool for them to use to inflate their own numbers.

This, also depressed me. Realizing the artificial nature of people’s seemingly ‘nice’ behavior.

The biggest issue for me was I felt that I was underutilizing my brain. Sitting there for hours on end, not learning anything or accomplishing anything and having people give me money for sitting there, talking to a computer screen.  Granted, there are people watching─ but not really. This depressed me further still. I was background noise to someone at work. This is how Twitch and live shows work. But, the fact that it’s background noise wasn’t a huge issue at the same time that it was. I realized I am broadcasting during someone’s workday, it’s to be expected.

Then there was the inevitable issue with me being female. (I know, I sighed openly too. I hate typing that sort of shit) It’s the same struggle that I have to deal with as a creator and writer. People would come into my channel and want to chat, but they didn’t ask me questions about the game, or game mechanics─ they asked me over-simplified questions about how I was enjoying it. Even when I went into detail about guns, elements, trap designs, game mechanics─ I wasn’t engaged until I was being a stupid person making dumb comments about random shit. Which again, in a nutshell, is what people want on Twitch. Average viewer age on my channel was somewhere between 12 – 23 until after 6 p.m. Again, normal but awful, and something I didn’t enjoy.

I’m a researcher, a writer, and a scientist. I don’t want to be viewed as some cam girl begging for money to play video games. Because, let’s be honest, that’s what 90% of the damn women do in that community.

I left for quite some time to get my head straight. This wasn’t what I wanted to do. I enjoyed writing, researching, creating shows and podcasts and audiobooks. I love games, but it’s a sacred time for me. A time to relax and really enjoy the game. Doing this every day was just leaving a bitter taste in my mouth to the entire thing. Then, there’s the overwhelming issue of everything you are expected to do as a streamer. It. was. ridiculous. and I constantly felt overwhelmed. I had so much to do each day before I streamed, constant things I had to read about the community, OBS, video editing, bots on bots on bots, use THIS music, no no use THAT music program, it’s better. Constant bickering and fighting in my channel, several unwanted comments, and private messages─ It was a mess.

And I will never, ever, go back to that again.

What I will go back to, is doing the things that make me excited and happy to be alive. No matter who or what is watching. I love to write, I love learning, and mostly─ I like doing it on my own time.

What you will see is my YouTube channel flourish with specials, new audio stories, books, short stories, and podcasts. I’m not gone, I’m just in a happier place.

(p.s. Vengeance is 3/5 completed, you’ll have the ending soon! Oh, and a collection of short stories available on Amazon soon. :3)

─ Grey ❤

 

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Fortnite Charity Event for St. Judes

Hey Guys! You may be wondering this coming week (June 5th – June 10th)   why I am not streaming more than 1 day. Rest assured my frens, it’s for a good cause. This week, I’ll be participating in A Fortnite to Save the Children a two-week-long event dedicated to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.  This is my first Twitch charity event and I can’t wait to be a part of it. I will be streaming for 12 hours straight from 7:00 a.m. CST – 7 p.m. CST to try and raise funds for this wonderful cause. We will also have viewership games, prizes, and entertainment for all. 

During this week, I will also be supporting other streamers and participating in the event with all of you! So don’t fret, if you notice Grey isn’t on but one day. It’s for a worthy cause, and I’ll be in the channels with all of you. ❤

I’m live every week from 2:00 p.m. – 8 p.m. CST Tuesday – Sunday on Twitch. 

More Fortnite Save the World Tutorials, podcasts, and books coming soon! 

If you’d like to support the channel, you can also find my personal art and works here and here.

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New Fortnite Tutorial Video Coming

This month is going to be a hectic one (nothing out of the ordinary, right?) but I have two things releasing this month. Vengeance part 3, the finale to the audiobook series and the next Fortnite tutorial!

This time I’ll be covering what characters do what in Fortnite Save the World, and the best types of characters to play to your advantage. If you ever have any questions, I’m live Sunday – Friday from 9 a.m. until 3 p.m. CST on Twitch. Usually, after my lives, I will upload them on my YouTube unless it contains copywritten music. (like my Fortnite gameplay generally does so they don’t get posted.)

My Discord and in-game name has changed over to cagreyson so you’ll be able to find me easier online!

Giveaways

This month I’ll be organizing a giveaway for my Subscribers on Twitch. The winner receives a free copy of Fortnite Save the World (aka PvE)! Details to come soon!

 

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Christmas Carols, Baking, and Twitch

Hi guys! If you haven’t noticed, my Tuesday comics are back up. Next year will start my new audio stories. If you missed this year’s, you can find them here.

Typically I prefer to do my weekly comics and then a blog style comic. Most of my blogs pertain to food, comics, and the occasional movie review if I feel strongly about it.

Due to how time-intensive my audio stories are and the fact that I want them to be perfect (since I use sound effects, voices, etc.) I typically don’t release more than 10 a year.

So, I’ll be doing the blog style comics every once in a while, but always sticking with my Tuesday schedule.

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If you didn’t know, I’m normally live every Sunday on Twitch from 10 a.m. – 12 p.m. I mostly play games, but I also do creative days too where I draw, bake, or make cosplay. 🙂

I’ll be on this Sunday, the 24th at my regularly scheduled time to play games, bake a pie, and sing a christmas carol or two. See you there. ❤

 

Stay creepy, (and festive!)

C